Can you let go when you don`t know what is waiting for you on the other side?
I realize that not anyone can do this and some of the reasons behind, in general line, I know and I can understand them.
I had a meeting into a business community, some time ago, when this conclusion hit me.
In the networking table there were entrepreneurs and another two ladies, older than me, representing two big companies. From corporate experience point of view, we were similar since I start working at 18, from position point of view I manage to get higher than one of the two and similar with the other one. They were in a fancy suit, I was cozy dressed.
After some other presentations was my turn.
I was saying that I just quit banking after 20 years (since one was in banking and the other into an area close connected with banking and finance sector), I loved it, I learn a lot from being an officer up to the managerial positions but it was the time for me to let go and to move forward.
Fortunately, I manage to build a situation that gives me the luxury, at least for a while, to do whatever I like, without being afraid of tomorrow, of my bills or food on the table.
I did what I had to do, I was always trying to be the best in what I was doing, most of the times I succeed but now is time to move on.
My job is not my identity!
My job was a perfect way to learn, practice my skills, and earn money. I loved it at that time but now I simply move on.
”What happened?” Did they asked? ”You didn’t like it anymore? ”
Is nothing like that. I loved it but my life goes on, I am trying to go to a different level. I simply want something else. My list of personal values and priorities has changed in time.
You are not afraid?
Afraid of what? Of failure? Of other people opinions? Of losing my status? Of starting all over again?
Of course I am!
Fear is just an emotion, a guardian trying to protect you from danger, actually from potential danger since you are not afraid of things that happened but of things that may happen.
I am a better person, with higher skills, more experienced and motivated to work on my own dreams now.
I am enough to go out of a corporate umbrella and to prove my value. I am not expecting to be easy but at least will be exciting.
Psychologically I am at a level that I care for my legacy.
I have a child. If tomorrow I disappear, what will remain from me? Except for the money and other values that can last for a short while… an impressive CV? Hmmmmm..
My kid will not remain with the idea that ”she was sensational ….I think, being so dedicated to her office that I could hardly see her not being tired, nervous or exhausted”.
I am overreacting of course but for many moms this is a cruel reality. Taking care of the grandsons will pay the bill, probably.
For the rest of the time during the networking session, the ladies they were simply not looking at me. So weird… It was a fast sessions.
I know is not about me, is about them!
I learn not to take personal any reaction around me.
To understand that I was just a stranger, they don’t care about me, how could they? Most probably they were believing I was insane, stupid or just brave.
Yes, is hard to let it go.
Is hard to say, I was this person, in this role up to now but I want more.
I am ready to jump into a new situation and again I will do my best, gain knowledge and skills and after, again, I will move forward.
You need lots of courage and determination!
Your brain will try to keep you into the comfort zone, to keep you safe, any new situation will be seen as a potential threat.
Say to your fear ”thank you for watching me but I am in control of my life, I am the driver, just stay around and watch”.
I can be a better version of me every day, just for being able to let go!
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